Confused.

Today was an another bad day. I don't know where should I go with this kind of feeling. I am in pain and no one understands me, so I won't utter any word to them because it would be useless.

My boyfriend and I are fighting right at this moment because he thinks I am being over protected to him but he doesn't really understand why am I doing this to him. I don't want him to party at night with his friends because I am already traumatized for what happened to him before.. he's a natural trouble maker- his looks and of course, I am avoiding the "girls". Next, he wants to play basketaball. How could I let him play basketball when he's always having a hard time breathing? He might faint again like what happened months ago. He wants to race. God, everyone knows it dangerous! Who in world would let his loved one do something unsafe? But yet, he doesn't understand.. he would never understand me. I am doing this for his own sake, not mine. I am not being selfish. I love him so much but I know I am hurting him already. What should I do? Let him go? Loosen up? I really don't know. I am so confused. I love him, that is all I know..