PAPA

I miss you Papa. Hows your life there? I know its better but I am pretty sure you miss us as much as we miss you too. You know what Pa, I am going to Japan next Sunday. Yeah, its true. I am going to fix everything that youve left. Mama will also be going there around September or October but she will be going back to Philippines as soon as everything is settled but me, I will be staying in Japan for good but I will be visiting Philippines too once in a while.

Papa, I know Ive never been a good daughter to you when you were still around. Like what you were always telling me, I was always ignoring you. But you are always important me and I know how much you love me because every mistake I made, you always forgave me.

This time, I will do everything for our family. Promise, I will be mature. I will act my age. Sorry for everything. Please guide me and Mama and my sisters as well.

Shimpai shinaide kudasai. Everything is daijobou.

I will miss you so much Brent Meng.

I will always love you.

Always remember that :)

I know it is bad to envy other people but dang, I cant help it ey! :(

Here`s the thing, MOST of the people I know are having the best of their lives.
Sigh. Getting pregnant by the men they love, getting married with them at the same time, graduating next year, blah blah.

And me? I am down and I can`t even kiss or hug my boyfriend even just for a sec cause he lives so far away and my momma`s gona throw me at my aunt`s home to work my ass off in Japan so I could send myself to uni. GAAH!

How I hate this feeling.
I feel a bit insecure, no! super insecure!

To my sweetest darling,


I know my decision was very sudden and everyones surprised and that includes you. I know you are shocked but sweets please do understand that I am doing this for my future, for my family and for us.

No matter what happens, my love for you will never change. You will be the first and last guy who will make me fall in love like this. You made me sooo maaadly in love with you bheib :) and it feels so good to have a boyfriend like you.

Even though you are sometimes hard to please, you are still the best boyfriend I have ever had and because of that, I want you to keep you forever. Can I?

It makes me teary eyed everytime I am thinking that things wouldnt be the same but I trust you and our love, I know this will last forever.

Promise mo ako lang ah?
Mahal na mahal kita Brent.

I wil visit you very soon. Please can I have the ring then? :D
I love you so much my munchkin.

I miss your lips! *smooches* and the abs as well *grin* :)

One month to go.


What will happen to me when I am back to Japan again? Will I have a good life? I hope so.

I am thinking of my relationship to Brent. We will be having a hard time then but I hope we could get it through like all the trials for the past few years.


Oh God, give us strength.


Dear life, dont be so harsh on me.

What is marriage?

What is marriage? This is a question asked thousands of times by the people who are wandering around and making for the gate of marriage. Strictly speaking, a marriage is an interpersonal relationship with governmental, social, or religious recognition, usually basing on a solemn contract. The most common form of marriage is a legally recognized union of a man and a woman by ceremony or common law as husband and wife. A marriage entails different meanings. True marriage in people’s mind is based on a loving relationship between a man and a woman in which they publicly promise to live together ‘for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health until death do them part’.

It is easy to make a definition; however, it is actually difficult to last a long and harmonious marriage life. Many married couples complain their hopeless marriage and search for the secret of keeping up a good relation with their mate. So what is marriage indeed and how to maintain a lifelong happiness with your partner? In fact, a perfect marriage relationship is a business which needs great efforts and energy to build up. Please bear in mind that a successful marriage depends on two things: finding the right person and being the right person. Finding the right person is a never-to-be-forgotten memory that you come across your Mr. Right who is the one you have been waiting for. But this is just the first step toward marriage. Being the right person adapting to your marriage is more significant. However, many people come to know this true essence of perfect match until taking apart due to lack of understanding and mental compatibility. So it’s important you know your partner and change step by step for your pace of marriage life.

Answers may vary greatly according to different generations for the question “what is marriage?” For the present youths, love is the only reason that marriage exists. When love dies out, marriages will definitely disappear. In contrast, some older people may hold the other side of the coin. Marriage is not just resulted from love between two individuals. There is much more to it. A successful marriage is like a good recipe whose main ingredients, besides love, are commitment, understanding, concern and loyalty. If you can include these aspects in your married life you can find happiness in your marriage.

Barnett Brickner once gave a good answer to the question “What is marriage and how to keep the intimacy in marriage?” He said that “Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate.” A happy married life calls for constant commitment and concern for each other. So when you fall in love with a person, it’s important to love him or her the way he or she is and not the way you want him or her to change for you. Since your mate is the partner you lost in the heaven, why not cherish each other for this life?

- Marriage 101

I will be recharging my positive vibes now!

Positive thinking is all I need :)

My life has completely changed since Papa passed away. Everything has changed.
But I guess that`s how the fate plays and you just have to go with the flow even it is too painful to handle. I am considering going back to Japan and temporarily live with my aunt (Mama`s sister) and find some work, at least I could afford myself to go back to college.

The hardest part is leaving my boyfriend. Well, not really literally cause he`s been away for three years now. He`s in Malaysia, by the way. But we always talk when the clock strikes at 11 PM. It`s like a habit. And we could text unlimited because he`s been hacking Jade`s mobile number and that makes a low cost at all.

If I am already in Japan, I could have a roaming number but you know, it would still be expensive for me to text him and we couldn`t talk anymore at night. Brent has been dependent on me since weve been together. And so do I.
For sure, I will be having a hard time adjusting since its already part of my system for almost five years.

I am going to miss my bestfriend too. She`s been my guardian and sister. A soul sister, indeed. Whenever I need her, she`s always around. She`s one text away.
Haaisss. It wouldn`t be the same if I am not in the Philippines anymore.

I`m gona miss my pooch as well. I can`t even sleep at night when she is not beside me. She`s my baby.



I`m gona miss a lot of people.
College friends, close cousins and of course my two siblings.
But its for my own good. I know someday, eveything will be okay again.



Positive vibes! :D
Gambaru yo!