The wake up call.

These past few days, I was trying to get rid of my boyfriend because he puts me into a lot of stress. I hate him being too childish and over protective. I even thought of breaking up with him so we could be independent from each other.

Last Friday, he was AGAIN engaged into a fight with a stranger.A trouble started from the "parking space" issue. I don't really know the whole story yet but I know it wasn't really serious.. He had a broken rib. And ummm, yes.. He needed to undergo a minor operation.

I was in deep depression. Things have been really tough for me lately and here we go again, another problem. Another cause of my depression.

I was on my way to school a while ago. I rode a bus, while I am inside it. Things have been running in my mind... that I need my boyfriend more than anything else. That, I really love him. Maybe I just got tired. Who doesn't, right? It is a normal thing... that I can't bare to lose him. I miss it when he keeps on calling me and asks me where am I, who I am with.. bla, bla, bla. I miss it when he wants me to baby him. I realized.. that I actually love him being childish and over protective. This must be a wake up call for me and I am very thankful God listened to all my prayers. He's okay now, by the way. He called me up a while ago. Just hoping for a fast recovery.

Bryce Jaden.

November 20, 2009.
11:45PM


We welcomed Bryce Jaden to the real world. Yes, yes it's true! My dear friend Jade already gave birth. I went to the lying in clinic around 8PM. Thinking that it maybe a false alarm again, I wasn't really that worried that much. But when I got inside her room, she was in real pain. I stayed beside her all night. I was holding her hand and I could feel she was terribly gripping it when her tummy is contracting. When she couldn't hold it anymore.. the midwife already decided to bring her inside the delivery room. I didn't go inside because i was nervous like everyone else. I could feel the tension in the air. And it is my first time to encounter this kind of situation. A real woman giving birth. I thought I could only see it in movies but then it happened...


After several pushes, the baby went out. But.. the baby didn't cry. We were in shock and everyone started crying because the baby supposes to cry but then he didn't. We thought he might be dead or... I don't know. I was clueless... blank... The midwife had to pump his mouth to give him oxygen, and put two tiny hose inside his nostrils and they did something more... after 10 minutes or less, the baby cried.. at last. Thank you Lord.


It was a very memorable experience for me. Seeing a woman giving birth in actual, especially that it is my friend. My baby weighed 2.5kg, that is around 5.5lbs. He has chubby cheeks, chinky eyes, fair skin, and black hair. Cute, indeed. I hope he'll be a good kid someday. I can't wait to see inaanak again!

"Everything that is happening in our lives has a purpose, be it something good or something bad. It never willed our lives to be like hell. So when a turning point seems so terrible, later you would notice that a wonderful thing compensates for the seemingly hopeless incident. Very often than not, our lives become better; and that is what they call- a blessing in disguise."



There would always be problems. We will never run out of it. We just have to be tough and strong enough to face it. Everything happens for a reason. We just always have to look at the brighter side of the situation.

Here's the reality.

Here I am again feeling blue. Life is indeed.. unfair. People come and go, just like what they did. I've loved several men but with some reasons they just left me. I had friends whom I thought they will be with me through ups and downs but sadly they're gone now. I don't know who are true to me and who are not. I am so confused and.. pressured. I am hoping that my current boyfriend will be my partner for life but I couldn't tell that yet. I love him, I trust him.. but this is reality.. in one snap he could find someone else, especially with the kind of relationship were having.. long distance relationship rarely works. 99% unguaranteed.

I am kind of saving myself from having fake people around me. I don't want to invest too much in a friendship. If they need me, okay I'll be there. If they don't want me anymore, okay fine, no problem. Friends come and go. I just wish friends could be contractual. If they want to continue being friends with me, then please sign the contract but if they want to get rid of me, okay just resign.


It is not really healthy to be dependent to people around me. Because at the end of the day, it would still be YOU alone lying on your bed. I was born alone, so I guess I would die alone too.


Life has full of surprises. Some are heartbreaking, most of the time actually. But that's life, imperfect.. and that's make it perfect.

Latest addiction.

I am currently addicted into something.. It is Janice and Sonia's cover of Officially Missing You by Tamia. I like the way they sung it. They have angelic voices plus gorgeous faces. If I am not mistaken, they are Korean twins based in Australia.


So there, take some time to check their video!
You won't regret it.



xoxo

Happy life style.

I had a check up last Thursday at Makati Medical Center. I decided to change my ObGyne for some reasons. So there, I had new set of medicines but luckily I don't have to undergo the same laboratory tests again, like what I did six months ago. She just told me to have a breast ultrasound so she could determine if I have lumps on my breasts because if there is she'll let me stop taking the pills and she also told me to have a cervical cancer vaccine and guess what it costs 3000PHP each shot and I need three shots. So all in all, I'll spend 9,000PHP plus 2,5000PHP for my ultrasound. So help me God.





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The doctor told me I need to be strict when it comes to my food. I have to have a healthy lifestyle so I tried googling a while ago for some healthy recepies. When I found a site specially made for Filipinos. You have to take a look!


Here's the link..

filipinovegetarianrecipe





Have fun!

Trials will make us a good person.

It's already late midnight and I couldn't sleep yet, as usual. I could feel my eyes are already tired and sleepy but my brain doesn't stop working. I've been thinking a lot of things about myself and about people around me. Currently, I am chatting with Ate Joevy's girlfriend and were talking about Jade's condition. Like me, she also feel pity for Jade and told me no one really knows what is the real reason behind Jade's pregnancy, especially about the baby's father issue. Of course, knowing myself.. I shut my mouth. I know everything but I have no right to say anything so I just went with the flow. She told me she wanted to help but she couldn't because she also have set of priorities which is I understand. I pity my friend for experiencing all these kind of sufferings. I can't say she deserves this because she has been a good person but as we all know, certain actions have consequences. I won't say it anymore here what she really did because it is her personal life but as for my personal views, there are a lot of people who deserve such thing more than her. I always tell her that she shouldn't lose hope and she should stay tough because her baby need her more than anything else. She should take this all as trials. After all of this, I know.. something good will happen next. Let's just wait and see...